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Do I Really Need to Post My Photo for Online Dating?


  by Jill Kane

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Online dating success relies on many factors, including your profile, your opening headline, and just how well you communicate once you jump in and start emailing or chatting with other members. But any online dating service will tell you, and most surveys agree that posting a photo is one of the real keys to online dating success. Although you don't want all of your hopes to hinge on your looks, it's true that most people who are browsing through an Internet dating site will first view the profiles that include photos. There are several reasons for this. First, it's simply nice to have a face to put with the profile and description. Second, some people, rightly or wrongly, are afraid that if you don't post your picture you might have something to hide, and third, some people simply have a particular look that appeals to them.

You don't have to post a picture of yourself if you don't want to, but you may be missing out on meeting some great people if you don't, since profiles with pictures get about 70% more responses than those that don't have photos. Of course, if you are uncomfortable having your photo on the Internet, nothing says you have to put it up for everyone to see. An alternative might be to mention in your profile that you would be glad to send a photo to anyone who is interested in corresponding. This way, you know that you've already gotten their attention with your profile, and you can limit who sees your picture. Try it this way if you are leery, but if you are disappointed with your early results, you might reconsider posting a photo of yourself. After all, the other members are there for the same reason you are - to meet someone as nice as you, and they've probably posted their photos already.

What Makes A Good Photo?

There are some things to keep in mind when posting a photo to an online dating site. First and most important is that it should be recent and accurate. Don't use a picture from eight years ago, and don't have a glamour shot taken so that you look like a soap opera star if that isn't what you look like in real life. They're going to meet you eventually if things go well, and you don't want them to feel like they've been deceived. A head and shoulders shot is best - and please either have a photographer or friend take it. Don't try it yourself at arm's length on your digital camera at 2:00 am - these always look poorly lit and "last minute." Some definite don'ts are pictures of you with your ex, pictures in lingerie (unless you want sexual propositions instead of dates), and photos of you with your mother or your car. Sorry, guys - women aren't nearly as impressed with your car as you are. If the online dating site you're joining allows you to post more than one photo, you can post additional ones that

Include friends, family or pets if these are important to you. Photos of you involved in a favorite activity (sailing, hiking, etc.) are also a good way to show some of your personality while letting others see what you look like. Just remember - the main picture should always be of just you, close-up and neatly dressed and groomed. And remember, that main photo is the image they will carry in their minds while corresponding with you - so if you're a casual person, wear a sweater or tee-shirt. If you're a more formal person, dress up a bit, so the photo reflects not only your appearance, but your personality. And remember, a picture really can paint a thousand words.

To read more about online dating help, visit Jill Kane's site at http://www.online-dating-help.com

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